A man's best friend

A man's best friend
shouldn't be his dog
or cat
or even his neighbor

A man's best friend
Is not his greed
ambition
or health

As all these lead to treason
As they came they went
In the end the man is left
Too many reasons in his mind
To not be able to trust, anyone

Yet this man has got something
It is there, too quiet to find
All his faith lays in loneliness
The company of the own soul

Apart from Him
The truthful God
A man's best friend
is the silence in his heart

I got thinking about this verses, or some of them that appeared in my mind today. It all happened after we met Shimon Adaf, a song and prose writer who came to talk today at school.
It all was about his work, his reasons to write, his passion for the ink.
I could find myself getting caught easily in his speech. I was absorbing every word of it and finding my points as others asked him about his techniches. I was answering myself those questions.

I find it really enjoyable, finding ways to express my thoughts on paper. I enjoy writing just as I enjoy listening to music. I really don't understand why people just banned his words saying he was too boring. For the fat part of it, it was really interesting.
I must admit that before some months I considered poems or songs just a waste of time. I usually waved everything that was similar to, what I called then, "bullshit" thinking it was just a bunch of words with no meaning trying to fool me. Some actually are, but many are not.

I just realized today how much I needed to hear that what I feel while I write is normal. I needed that pinch of solidarity, and in some way I found it today on Adaf's talk.
I think I really have to take my feelings further, if it is by this medium then why not?
So I will be posting stuff soon. This verses are a combination of a two minute writing today when I was waiting for the bus, plus another 3 of fast thinking now.

Today was just a day. Had an exam on Hebrew expression, and to judge by my feel I think it went pretty good. I wrote an article based on someone who wrote about the lessons of the Holocaust from the point of view of today's techniches to do it, which is mostly through a trip to Poland. He thought that it was wrong as it wasn't centered in Israel or the Jewish people. I got my point and attacked the Jewish ego. But this is some topic for another time.

So after that I had the talk with the writer and later went home.
I just kept thinking today of the Commando Units available and opted to take the long shot, "The Unit". It is the hardest unit, but I got the feel this was to be my choice. I feel fine with it.
I just started gaining back my training tradition, which I left after I saw my chances to be in the Air Force were way to low to take that shot. Still, I got too many questions about it. May God help me decide.

This eve I was to the "Spanish School". Just by the Finn one. Had a great time though I really felt pissed off. I saw the entrance to the Finn School and it all remembered me of how fresh is the pain of letting Tytti and Laura go. Tomorrow Ruha, maybe the only one who can help me now, is flying to Finland too. It just can't be true.
I remember I used to hate her a bit, I just couldn't trust her in nothing. I felt disconnected from her mind, but she was such a help in the last time. She just knows so much, and God was right. I saw her as an answer to a prayer in which I asked help and guidance from Him. I thought that maybe he showed her in my dream so I could know she was the one to help me, and she was. Thanks Ruha for all the support.

Little blog, I gotta go. Puzzled and disconnected as before. But today I realized that even though I don't feel anything I feel fine. I just seem to have a brief disconnection between my mind and feelings, but this time I feel its for good. As Ruha said, "It may not be on God's schedule".
I just feel so fine. To be able to leave the problems to Him is just the best comfort I could get, I feel no pain, nor bad for what I will do. I just hope the other side gets to understand as me that my time has not yet come.

Good night.